It has been a difficult few days. STBX, OM and D13 are off on a 10 day 'vacation' in Oregon. They are camping and working their way to Seattle to visit STBX mom. Her mom doesn't seem to have a problem with her daughters 'boyfriend' while we are still married. After all, I didn't take good care of her daughter and she is entitled to be 'happy'.
D13 really doesn't like OM. So this is kind of bad for her having to be stuck in the car with them with no escape. Whenever I text her she has nothing positive to say.
As for me, it hurts to think that there will be no family vacations. I could sure use one.
It's so weird to think that there is nobody I know who has anything positive to say about OM, other than he's 'harmless' and will do whatever STBX says. Both of them seem to have the same maturity level.
I don't know what hope I've been hanging on to. This trip is the wake up I need to tell me it's over. STBX wants us to be friends and sometimes when I see her she gives me that smile that she used to give. That's the thing that puts me off guard.
I'm sure inside she still loves me in some way. This just hurts and I've stayed still for too long. There is no hope anymore. Time to really move on.
