One of the issues my W and I (probably me since I am the one leading right now) have to confront is where are we and where are we going. On the night my W dropped the bomb on me, I asked her to go to counseling. She said no, she had seen a C (unknown to me) for the prior 6 months and was done with that. Obviously, that was then, when I now understand she had a great deal of anger and hurt inside her. Things seem much different now. We are relaxed around each other, she acts like she is happy to be around me. But, it is like we are just good friends.
Since the bomb, I have DB'd my rear off, which has included no R talks, much less any talks about C. Early on (the last R talk we had, which was about 4-5 days after the bomb), I told her I was making some big changes in my life (which I have done) and that all I asked of her is that she give me enough time to SHOW her my changes (yes, I know I should have just done them, but this was pre-DB for me - I haven't discussed them since) before she made a final decision about D. That was the last time we discussed anything about our R, and that was in late April.
So, that gets back to my issue: if she has not indicated (overtly) that she is ready to work on our M (including C or a program like Retrouvaille), how do we get that issue out in the open. I have not tempreature checked the R, and have been very careful not to pursue. Is it too early for me to approach her about such a discussion. That's what I meant by the title of this thread (Is it time to start piecing).
