cabbr - Stop worrying about what she wants. What do you want? How do you foresee this playing out so that you are satisfied? If your W has worked in the past, let your L know. They can prove that she is capable of working and that can help you in your case. And yes, they will tell her to get a job - and that is a benefit to you.
Legal fees are unavoidable. I can't tell you how bad mine have gotten. But so what, I have my kids. You can't put a price on that. If your W really has these grand visions of her life at some point she may see the kids as in the way of them. You want to make sure you have enough custody to shield them from that. And if she sees how serious you are about custody it may scare her a bit.
Strength and Honor.
Mules
Mules,
My W had a very successful career prior to kids, but has not worked in about 10 years. My L indicated the same thing, i.e. she can and should work.
Assuming this goes where it appears to be headed, I would like to have at least 50% legal and physical custody and retain the house. The only question with custody is that since I work full time, my time is not as flexible as a SAHM. The house may be a long shot, but obviously the kids are what's most important. Beyond that not having to pay support to her for more than a few years would be preferable. At this point, I really haven't flushed these issues out in any depth with my L. Things have been moving fast lately. I'm just coming up on 4 months post bomb.
She definitely wants her independence from me, but my W is pretty responsible as a Mother. She is certainly making time for herself to do things and sharing baby sitting with friends to enable her to do things.
M:49, W:47 M:22,T:23 S9, S6 W probable MLC Bomb: 4/09 In-house separation and Separate bedrooms since 4/09 EA busted: 7/09 W filed: 7/09 Kids unaware of D filing
