3 1/2 years into MLC

[Holly06]

And now for the flip side.
BTW snowman, hijack away. I want this thread to be helpful and healing for all, if posting helps, PLEASE do.

Well if I am going to really show this journey for all its true colors, I need to update.

Moving D 4 hours to law school pad, (yes I am very very proud) and I had a lot of time to kill. So I use the darn phone. I took this time to connect with TJ's sister, because I truly had some spiritual questions regarding my girls and maybe getting ready to use this time to witness God's faith to my kids. She knows my girls and is a very strong spiritual influence in my life, so she was my go to person.
My question was is this the time to start preparing them for God''s miracle? It could make an impact on their walk to God. I know they are young adults and very busy and have life by the tail and do not need the spiritual connection, but I think that needs to wait until things look a little more certain.
Judy shared some observations of my family during the 4th of July visit she made to TJ who was hosting the kids for a weekend. She noticed that my girls are not really all the way there comfortable with the their dad yet. They are still healing the relationship. There was lots of talk about me. TJ was comfortable about all referenced to me, and even helped the kids prepare my birthday present by taking the pictures for the project. Shared with Judy and family, comments da da da.
She also said she saw that the kids would welcome their family back together again. The kids keep that view entirely blocked to me!!! They kept the comments about me up!
TJ did not appear to be drinking and has not for a while.
TJ seems more comfortable and more himself.



And TJ is still talking with OW and has gone to see her and her him. He insists they are just friends. Just friends.
TJ is very busy filling him time with other activities. (I think he is lonely). Judy has made it clear how she feels about OW, and she is not seeing any signs of getting back together.
Time will tell. Judy also says he seemed ashamed of this fact. But she was really glad he was telling the truth. (after all, the lies are always the most damaging).

Yes, this hurts. I am handling it. Really didn't even cry. Just disappointed.
So now I analyze this and think that God really has his hand on this. TJ is not well enough emotionally to start a new relationship. If he want to come in my direction (and I am not even sure he realized that he wants to be with me) he has a long way to go to turn to me to fill the loneliness. It must be very hard.
I don't think he has any friends.
She might be all he has. So he claims he is friends with her, and after all, he needs this and no one else is filling the need.
Now I am not looking for opinions here. This is the path I am choosing to take. I am being public here so you can see the mistakes or the way this thing became successful. I hope to aid you in your marriage restoration by being transparent, for better or for worse.
I am OK. I am even turning this into the best possible option within the possible options. ( too many options here) But for now, I am OK.

I can't find that damd bucket tho............
really need it after my trip

Love you too Was.