Hold onto Your N.U.T.S is a highly regarded book for men.
And you're right. You can't make her happy, only she can. It's good that she's going to see a counselor to work on that. That gives you time to work on you!
I remember spouse saying at one point that he always thought I'd get 'better' but ended up accepting that I was damaged goods. That the depressive effects of my childhood traumas would never go away. Like.. ouch!
Be an ear for her. Listen without speaking. Listen without fixing. Validate (I can see how you feel that way.), make positive noises (Uh huh.. hmmm.. yes..), nod your head occasionally, repeat what you've heard if necessary (If she says.. you're not listening to me!)
When women have big booboos on their heart, they not looking for Mr. Fixit. It's Mr. Ear and Duct taped Mouth.. someone 'safe' who loves and accepts all of them, their warts included.
