Divorce not busted 2

[Dia]

Ok, so that's looking like Quality Time and Physical Touch. Touch is tricky because when things are difficult, many people don't want to be touched (it provokes fear, I think) and an attempt may push them further away. Quality time is easy, though. It means you have to spend some time focusing just on her, listening, making eye contact, doing something together if that's what she wants, or even just sitting and talking. It doesn't have to be a long period of time, even 10 - 15 mins will work.

About the hair brushing - you might consider if there's a way to make this a 'safe' activity for her, where it wold be just the hair-brushing w/o leading to love-making. The hard part is giving the safety net (I won't pressure you to ML) without also rejecting her. Maybe someone else will have some ideas?

I'm thinking of some sort of time limit, such as - "I'd like to spend a few minutes brushing your hair before you go to bed." Or maybe suggesting that she bring the hairbush to the couch while you watch TV? Moving the activity out of the bedroom might make it feel safer?

P.S. Caveat - Keep in mind that I'm not so great at the whole initiating vs. not pursuing thing.