we'd each do insulating activities to shield ourselves from the rejection of the other not wanting to be with us.... when really all we both wanted was to be together and be wanted.
BINGO! My W and I do this.
That's why I suggested just try being in the room with her IWTW and see if she just happens to take a break from working on the computer to ask you something. If that happens, the question is irrelevant. She wants you to talk to her and listen. Just try it and see what happens.
