But then again, I feel like..am I running away? Who am I running away from?
Yes, I think you are trying to run away from who you are and from your circumstances. It seems like you've been self-destructive for awhile, with the weight gain, lashing out, etc.
It seems like you're starting to realize that there's nowhere to go to get away from you. So start being the "you" you want to be. The "you" that you will love and cherish and take care of.
Start now.
And for heaven's sake, stay away from his FB and MS. Unless you're a true masochist!
