I know whenever I see something that makes so much sense or so interesting to help explaing this madness or warn against it - i get those thoughts..I should send this to my X -- UGHHH like reading what silver fox posted about the H who had the affair wrote about their thinking...that is intersting....
Hi, I think I have a little insight into how or why affairs can last so long. My X told his sister that she does not understand that he can not have a failed marriage AND a failed relationship.
That is amazingly understandable, in a twisted sort of way.
Bomb 1/06 D dismissed 11/07, attempt reconciliation. Premature. Divorce final October 31, 2008. OW looks like bad history. Over. Still hopeful. Baby steps. In R with my X.
same here, I believe my ex will put up with a really crappy relationship rather than admit fault.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
Bomb 1/06 D dismissed 11/07, attempt reconciliation. Premature. Divorce final October 31, 2008. OW looks like bad history. Over. Still hopeful. Baby steps. In R with my X.
Trusting and Holly, my x said those VERY words to me last summer about bimbo. He said "CAGZMOM I am trying to make THIS relationship work.." I said something like "WOW how big of you.. you bailed on a 20 year relationship in what seemed like a day, but this one you are going to work on this one..." (AND I know that wasn't what i was suppose to do.. it was over a year ago guys!!)
Who knows why. I just know it hurts. All of it hurt.
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
Mine will even admit he is miserable with her. He has told me multiple times that they fight constantly and she fights vicious. She has even called the police on him for domestic violence. Ex and I hardly ever fought except for when his crisis started. He would purposely fight with me.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
One of the very first things my H told me about his R with OW was that they fought "like cats and dogs". I remember asking perhaps that's what he enjoyed? Maybe he was bored with me? (we did not fight like that) No, he says, it's not pretty.
Curious.
Me 56 H 47 Married 21 years No children Bomb & moved out 4/07 "My feelings have changed" & "I want to live by myself". Ow Bomb 8/07 H filed 6/08 D final 2/05/10
i have witnessed my h fight over the phone with psycho ow. i have never ever heard him scream like that and we never ever fought. he told our friends last year, when he admitted to having the affair, that they fought often and it got ugly.
how interesting we all have the same story...
me: 31 H:29 Son:5 m:8 years in november t:10 years first bomb: 10/06 moved home: 3/08 out again 5/08 ow bomb: 4/08, since summer 06 d filed:6/08, on hold 6/08 moved home:3/09 out again 5/09
