Well, good, but weird, uncomfortable good. Got home today and went to work out. When I got back from the gym, W was home. As I'm making dinner, W mentions that her last work day is Thursday (I knew) and that her mom offered some timeshare points at a place very close to my in-laws. W tells her mom she will check with me after I check my calendar and see if I mind if "she" takes the kids for a mini vacation before kids go back to school.
Oh man, here we go again - I don't think I'm invited. I say "think" b/c its unclear - if I'm not going, why would it matter what is on my calendar - then again, she said "she" wanted to take the kids.
Although I feel my heart sinking, I keep my cool ,and continue making dinner. I really didn't respond to W. After a few minutes, she asks "what do you think about it?". I tell her that sounds great.
A little while later, she asks if "Do you want to go with us?" Its almost as if it is an afterthought to her. I respond, after pausing for a moment, yeah, I would, I guess I wasn't clear on that. I know, a little needy but I really wasn't.
So, now, I feel like I have just been invited as an afterthought. If I did not know any better, I think she's using my DB techniques against me. I'm not supposed to be the one confused - she is.
While I am glad to be going, and, yes, she did not have to invite me, but I still feel like she may not have wanted me to go.
Is this how the WAS tests the waters when they reach out? I understand she is still hurt and has a big obstacle to conquer (trusting that my changes are for real). I also realize it is hard for her to overcome her fear of allowing herself to be vulnerable to me.
