I want my Monkey and Sheep Back

[Virtually_Handsome]

The only positives I can see are living rent free and being able to save up.

Pretty big positives until you have a job. That will help you be able to choose what you want, and not have to take the first thing that comes along.

[beepee]

That will help you be able to choose what you want, and not have to take the first thing that comes along.

I've been searching around for places for a long time and this is the only place I really want to live.

[Virtually_Handsome]

I understand your pain!

I have often found that good things happen when you are not looking for them. Work on you GAL. Keep seeing your friends. Something could well happen when you least expect it. It sounds stupid, but I really think it is true. The less pressure you put on yourself, the easier it is for things to come to you.

((((((beepee))))))

[beepee]

I understand exactly what you're saying Jeff, I find that happens to me sometimes too. thanks for your support

[Virtually_Handsome]

Besides, taking some pressure off of yourself can't hurt, either!

[Gardener]

I know there are positives

Good.

I just have to stop dwelling on the negatives that are happening right now but its very hard.

So are you going to say, "I can't because..." or "I will in spite of..."

The only positives I can see are living rent free and being able to save up. That's all I can really think of to be honest.

That could be a real good'un.

I don't have nearly as much energy as I did yesterday and I haven't done anything but search jobs and apartments.

Maybe that's why. Perhaps doing something physical like take a walk would reenergize you - and clear your head..

Easier said than done.

Everything is easier said than done.

I have to figure out what I can do to help make me feel better.

And I have no doubt you will.
((()))

[beepee]

The crying spells have been really bad today.
Haven't been able to stop. Tried to do some physical activities. Still kept crying. Feeling really hopeless right now.

Maybe I should try to sleep now and hopefully feel better tomorrow but I took a long nap earlier because I was crying too much. I'll try to sleep now anyway. Wanna crawl under the covers until everything goes away. Not liking this feeling.

Looking forward to a brighter day tomorrow.

[beepee]

The weather is just getting more and more humid. It's so stuffy I can hardly breather. I wish I had some AC! My fan is just blowing hot air around the room!

Well, I'm determined to have a better day today despite what happened yesterday. I got an email from the former potential roomie and he isn't too happy I feel really bad. I'm going to see if my dad will just go ahead and do it for me despite his credit. Just to see if it'll work. We'll see. Hopefully he's OK with it.

There's quite a bit that I should do today in order to keep my mind off everything and prevent the feelings of yesterday from creeping back.

1) fold laundry (didn't do it yet)

2) re-organize clothes in drawers

3) make a few important phone calls

4) file away important documents/paperwork

5) put up some more furniture on craigslist

6) photograph some more items to go up on ebay

7) Get dad to cosign (fingers crossed)

8) Go through today without crying, getting down, or thinking any negative thoughts, must snap if they come!!


Now, I'm going to take a cold shower, dress, blast some happy music, and get on with my day in a positive manner. I'm not going to let anyone take away my spirit and will to live.

[The Wifey]

The crying spells have been really bad today.
Haven't been able to stop. Tried to do some physical activities. Still kept crying. Feeling really hopeless right now.

Maybe I should try to sleep now and hopefully feel better tomorrow but I took a long nap earlier because I was crying too much. I'll try to sleep now anyway. Wanna crawl under the covers until everything goes away. Not liking this feeling.

Looking forward to a brighter day tomorrow.

Beepee,

Can you understand why your brother might not be willing to sign the co-sign paper? Perhaps he sees you crumble and fall apart at the first sign of disappointment and he doesn't think getting out on your own is the best thing for you right now.

You can go into a spiral or you can re-double your efforts to make a change, to get better, and believe in yourself so he can come to believe in you, too.

Life is hard. Even without the S, life is very hard. Pinning your hopes on just that apartment, just that situation, just that location set yourself up for the disappointment that followed.

When you mentioned the reasons for your bad credit, you listed all of the loans you'd gotten, but not one bit of responsibility for any defaults. These things didn't happen to you - these are the results of your actions.

I say this not to hurt you, but to wake you up. Improving your life starts with a decision that you are tired of living like this and taking responsibility for your self.

If a crying spell comes on it is perfectly normal, because you are going through a sad, sad experience. Letting yourself cry all day is not ok. Give yourself a time, set an alarm, cry until that alarm goes off and then get up. Splash water on your face.

Had you gotten that apartment, but not had a job yet, how on earth did you expect to make the rent every month? You need a job first. Then when you get a job, a budget. Then an apartment.

Then you need to work on repairing that credit, which begins with contacting the lenders for your loans and working out a repayment plan.

You can do this. It isn't easy, but it is simple. There's a big difference between simple and easy.

Start today. Fresh day. New start. I know you can!

[beepee]

Wifey:

I understand why he wouldn't cosign for me but I have a huge problem with him saying he would do it and then after a week of me asking him everyday if he finished, he still didnt tell me that he wasn't going to do it, I had to go up to him and ask him. He didn't communicate with me at all. That's my biggest issue. I understand why he won't cosign, it's just the false hope he gave me and the lack of communication.

When you mentioned the reasons for your bad credit, you listed all of the loans you'd gotten, but not one bit of responsibility for any defaults. These things didn't happen to you - these are the results of your actions.

I know, I don't blame anyone for this but myself.

Had you gotten that apartment, but not had a job yet, how on earth did you expect to make the rent every month?

Been saving up and am constantly selling items that will fetch a lot of money. I'm also applying for a million jobs, I'm thinking positively and telling myself that I'm bound to get one within 2 months. I wouldn't be moving in until another month which gives me more time to sell more stuff and save up enough for rent for the first few months and I am confident that I will get a job within those few months. I have doubled my efforts and I'm being optimistic. Maybe overly optimistic to everyone else, but that's how I feel.

Then you need to work on repairing that credit, which begins with contacting the lenders for your loans and working out a repayment plan.

Have already started doing that today!