I get it. I really do. I vent on here because I can and I don't really want to get into it with folks I know in the alt. I think my mistake was actually listening to and believing what she was saying, rather than what she was actually doing.
The truck thing has more to do with her insistence on the speed of things. Honestly, I don't want it. It's a piece of junk and we're both surprised it is still running. The car is mine. It's not up for debate. I'm not offering it. The exchange of titles before we've come to an actual financial agreement seems out of order to me is all. Since I don't trust her it makes me wonder if she has some ulterior motive in this. That's all.
I have lots of questions and I don't think those are going to go away anytime soon. As much as I would like what she says/does to not affect me, that's not where I am right now. I'm done asking her anything else. I don't believe what she has to say anyway. It's not really going to help me anyway. Do I think I am worth more than what she is offering? Absolutely. Do I deserve any of this? Unequivocally, no. At the same time, I'm struggling to find that balance of moving on with my life and slamming the door shut forever, which FOR ME I know is how I typically deal with things. I know that once I choose that path, reconciliation is off the table for good and that causes me some pause. I think taking time to really sort that out FOR ME is the best thing to do.
