Everyone can tell me I should not have but what's done is done... I found something on the computer today. H sent the b!tch an e-mail (on 7/11) with activities in Philly in Sept. H wrote: "Oh yeah....forgot to mention too......I charge for my tour guide services! You'll need to pay me in some way!!! " with a stupid smiley face after.
Yes, perhaps I deserve a lecture... I know I'm causing more pain for myself. What is interesting about this is it confirmed a suspicion I had. A few months ago H said something about going somewhere for a week in Sept for work. At the time I knew something sounded fishy.
Honestly I don't know what I'll do if Sept comes around and H goes to meet the bi!ch. One thing for sure, I won't be sitting at home...
H and I got into again this afternoon. H says he's still 'so confused', 'just doesn't know', 'needs to pull his head out of his a$$' etc... H tells me if roles were reversed, he would have left me 2 months ago. Later H asks to have sex and once again, I explain the reasons it's not gonna happen. Then H tells me sex will "help him feel closer to me." H also tried the "You're pushing me further away but not having sex with me."
I know I want my M back together but at times I feel as if H is nearing the limit of how much I can take. I am trying to be patient. I don't need to tell you guys but it's just so hard to watch the one you love piss on everything that means anything.
Me: 39 H: 39 S: 15 M: 18 years Bomb: 6/3/09 H moved out: 10/15/09 H moved back:5/30/10
