I want my Monkey and Sheep Back

[beepee]

All my friends live an hour away and they were all at work and they're all really busy today so I couldn't reach any of them.

I'm trying not to think about things by watching something funny but it keeps crossing my mind and I got hit with a crying spell. Its over now thank goodness.

I know there are positives, I just have to stop dwelling on the negatives that are happening right now but its very hard. The only positives I can see are living rent free and being able to save up. That's all I can really think of to be honest.

I know this is going to make me so much stronger. I know it will. But right now, I only feel like I'm getting weaker and weaker by the minute. I don't have nearly as much energy as I did yesterday and I haven't done anything but search jobs and apartments.

I can't help but get angry at H for making me go through all this, but I know its not his fault. No one is responsible for the way my life turns out but me. It just makes it that much harder to try and move on from H when I physically can't move on.

I know, I know, don't let this get me down. Easier said than done.
I have to figure out what I can do to help make me feel better.