Hi JR,
A lot of successful people here refer to DBing as a marathon - not a sprint - so I would say you're in very good company in terms of your perspective.

That calmness you're describing comes through in your words as well - and I think it's wonderful for you to acknowledge it and appreciate it about yourself. I would say that you're a kind person outside of your mind as well. I think that kind of internal peace helps us prepare for and understand the idea of loving someone enough to let be willing to let them go. It's not that we give up - that's not the same thing - it's more of a sense that we will be fine no matter what happens - and we can love our partners with a detached, giving, generosity that is much easier to offer when we are calm within ourselves - and not projecting our issues onto another person - or expecting our partners to "fix" things for us.

I would say that the calm you're feeling in yourself is also a way to gauge just how strong you have become - strong enough to feel what you have to feel, and strong enough to take care of what needs to be taken care of every day.

I was glad to read what you wrote today - you said a lot of stuff that I needed to remind myself of as well...

Thanks,
Carlos.


Me:39
S3,S13

"We consent to live like sheep." W.H. Auden

On my own
Separation #4