All of this fun, and him seeking me out to make sure I'm having a good time, making sure I have something I like to drink, making sure I see how cute S12 is being w/his girlfriend, etc... And, yet, I'm still in tears (alone) five to six times a day.
It's the loneliest crowd I've ever been in.
All of the restaurants in Lake Geneva we drove by were ones we had gone to on "married" dates just a few years back. I see my S12 with his arm around his gf watching TV, and my H bringing me to see them, makes me remember when he would want to be close to me. Etc. Etc. Etc.
What do I do? I can't live like this. I don't feel attractive because of the extra 20 lbs or so I'm carrying. I can't bring up our R because it leads to nowhere. H loves to make sure I'm having a good time, have what I would want, etc... but hugs the side of the bed when we're in it.
I feel like my head could explode from worry and stress. It's almost harder to enjoy myself with him all day, and live like a normal family. And, then... nothing else.
It's been a long time.
ya know..I read here and see really good things..I'll suggest this again..
work on yourself....if you hate the extra 20 pounds then work to take it off..
I see really good things from your husband..he's making sure you are included, he's taking your side witht he kids..he sounds like he provides..the weekend sounded enjoyable..
you need some patience...more than you know you have..work on you..and it might make him hug something besides the bed..
