What little I've tried to pass on to the men around here...maybe at least they all are smelling great! laugh I bet this is the best smelling board on the web!

Quote:
“One thing I am going to watch carefully is the impact this may have on her self esteem and general attitude. She has (IMHO) always placed too much importance on her job as a form of identifying who she is. I take the approach that I work to live, not live to work. My career is important, but it is not WHO I am.

Anyone have any thoughts on the potential impact upon W's mindset? “


Well, I think most of the women who have professions/careers these days are like the men feel about their careers. I remember when the women’s lib movement started and the women were throwing away their bras (looked like a bunch of jersey cows running around) and was saying that staying at home with kids was not fulfilling them, etc. Then time passes and most women are working these days and being homemakers also. Puts a lot of pressure on the gals. I tend to agree though, that a lot of them do place a great deal of their self-esteem and “who” they are with their jobs. I will admit that my job affected my self-esteem in a positive way. If I had worked at “some” places, I don’t think my esteem would be as healthy as it is b/c I remember leaving one place simply b/c it did not make me feel good about myself. It was a good job, but I just did not feel good about it. Some are seen as a “job” and some are careers (lol) and it does make a difference (IMHO). But I agree with you in that we should not live to work, b/c that is not what life should be about.

I don’t know how well you’ve complimented your W in the past…about her achievements or how you admire her ability to be tough in the workforce, etc. but it would probably do her a world of good to hear that right now. Don’t make it sound like a compliment, but rather a “matter of fact” statement. Just like you did here on the board when you were saying what you did about her and knowing that her boss had to be rude for her not to be able to take it. My H admires me in ways that never cease to surprise me, but he acts as if I should “know” that without him telling me…(lol). He acts like, “Well, Sandi, don’t you know ….yada, yada?” It’s funny.

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!