Partner left after 9 yrs - 18months on, reunited !

[AliSuddenly]

Hello everyone, thank you SOO much.. I wanted to post back to you all, but I was so busy catching up with others, I ran out of time. I get no time to myself these days, haha!

In the meantime, till I can post some more.. thanks so much for your suggestions, I really took them on borad. Like tonight, I felt down, so I kind of hid it and stepped away after a few words and was bright and jolly and said I had stuff to do, left him to have an evening in and now I am refreshed and heading back.

We had a big drama on Saturday.. I found lots of photos of Helen, well, maybe a dozen.. but in different events.. Bonfire night (that was hard, I stayed in, missed him so much it nearly killed me and he was down the road at a do with her).. the Tall Ships (ditto, I ended up going by myself, sensing he was nearby. I felt SO alone that day, he was there with her).. a night out at dinner.. her dressed up, he said she texted him that one for some reason, I said, you mustve thought she looked nice..

On and on, it was awful, seriously. I thought of DBing and planned to put the ipod down and not tell him (he had deleted everything off the PC/camera, but downloiaded it to the ipod, I didnt ask why).. but this involuntary scream/sob came out of me! So he bounded downstairs ina panic.. whats wrong, whats wrong !!??? So I told him...

He was VERY reassuring, sorry, just mortified basically. He hasnt stopped huggijng and kissing me since. We had alot of talks about her then and he says he wasnt happy, but thought he was for a short time. It was probably a good thing I found them as he told me I am 'better' than her in every way and that he loves me so much and that it nearly killed him to be apart from me.

he said some more general stuff anbout his state of mind too, as a WAS, I will psot some more, but I have to go for now!! Miss you all guys. Piecing is very very very hard. But there are lots of lovely bits, believe me, adn thanks for stickign with me!
Al xxx