I've been quizzing my bf a bit, like I said to Julia, for myself, but also.. for you all here I wish I could help a little with the mind of a WAS. So, when you said..
"Al- you're right that my H is incredibly confusing. He even said to me himself yesterday that I probably know how bad he is at making decisions! It was tempting to say that he'd definitely made some bad ones but I didn't; maybe he's realising himself that he did."
My bf is exactly the same, really bad decision maker. In regards to the ow.. he said to me.. he made a BAD decision.. that he didnt think it through, it just happened and also, that when it did he didnt know what he was doing, who he was or what he wanted. BUT.. once it happened, he felt SOOOO guilty, he couldnt even speajk to me (I ended up emailing him if you remember). He didnt know what to say, he knew I;d be upset and as he still cared about me, he felt awful and didnt know how to put it right., So what did he do he said? Nothing, I buried my head in the sand. Another bad decision.
I asked him why he started an R with ow, if he thought when he met her/ran off with her.. yes, she would make a good life partner for me rather than Al. He said he never thought of it that way and didnt think it through at all, whether or not she would make a good life partner.
I dont know if that helps, but often it seems, EVERY thing I had intuition about was pretty spot on. I guess we know our partners so well and if your H is anything like my bf, hes perhaps reather transparent in some respects. So you probably have a good measure of him. He doesnt know what he is doing and didnt make a good decision.
Thikning of you lisa, keep us posted ! xxxx
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
