Hey SP, I'm not going to be offended by the implication there.
Not sure what the implication is, but that's good.
how the assignment of blame and the extraction of "truth" is too subjective to be reliable
Yes, exactly, exactly what I'm getting at. So for example when you do your "he wins / I lose" thing by way of beating up on yourself, that whole construction is predicated upon a totally subjective evaluation of what the Truth in the situation is. Which isn't helpful, because it's just self-directed angst.
I also see so much WAS dissecting here that I doubt any of us really subscribe to the belief that they're awesome and we just s*ck
Maybe, maybe not -- but that notion sort of lurks there, right? The mantra "your changes are for you" really gets at the generally unspoken recognition that, in many cases, the changes are -- or, at least, are started for -- the WAS. This whole notion of figuring out what you did "wrong" and then fixing it is predicated upon the WAS's implied POV, all warnings against "mind-reading" to the contrary notwithstanding.
I can't see worrying about changing something that might hypothetically appeal to the next Mrs. SP. You change the things that YOU feel you need to change for your own well being. The next Mrs. SP will fall in love with you where you are at that point.
Well one would hope. My interest there is in this kind of macro discussion of what one's True Self really is. I mean, if you go around changing everything you are -- an exaggeration to make the argument! -- in response to the crisis of The Bomb, then are you "real" for the next Mr. or Mrs.? Wouldn't it be ironic if, for example, LBH "realized" that his W left him because he was too distant emotionally and so 180'd and became totally available emotionally -- and his next W said, "Man, I wish you were more aloof emotionally -- this closeness is driving me batty!"
So what's with all this rambling brooding anyway? Well I suppose it's that I'm in this sort of trough, DB-wise. I'm kind of plateauing on the GAL stuff -- it's the dog days, after all -- and the sitch is in some limbo (not @Thinker's limbo, but literal limbo, just no movement on anything until The Mouthpiece lays it out), so I'm just stepping back and looking over the past 6 months as an analytical problem.
And you didn't irk me -- I was worried that you'd taken all sorts of offense.
On the other hand, tomorrow is the big MC2 #1 session, so we'll see what kind of madness ensues there. Still not sure why we're even going, but hey -- as Coach says, take every opportunity to "be there."
