Sandi2, Coach, Puppy and Gucci help!

[Bravehardt]

Wifey

Thanks again for breaking everything down. I've been away from the board for a couple of days just trying toget back on level ground.

Here is what has happened since my last post on Friday.

The W dropped D 6 off Saturday around 10am and came in for a while, she was in a very nice mood. D 6 was on Cloud 9 after spending a couple of nights with her mom. Sounds like they had a great time together. It was good for both of them.

So after all the fuss a few days ago my W tells me what her schedule is for this coming week! I was kind of surprised to say the least. So I played it cool and said I would firm up the days that will work out tommorrow. Note: None of the days really help me out, but I'll make some adjustments for the kids.

Saturday night the W left D 6 a message on our homes answering machine. This is a first, she describes how she will miss her tonight and please call when she heres the message. D 6 did not here it till about noon today, she spent the night at my sisters (so I could get out and GAL).

After picking D 6 up from my sisters, D 6 seemed very sad. I ask what was wrong she said she did not know. So I said what would make you the happiest little girl in the world right now (not including a new pet or toy) and she replied If my momma came back home to live with us. Yes that would be very nice you should tell her that sometime.

D 6 listened to the message from her mom, then returned the W call soon after, only to get her voice mail, she just said Momma I want you to come back home and hung up.

The W returned her call a couple of hours later, they chated for awhile and then D 6 hand me the phone. The W wanted to know if she could come by for awhile and see the kids around 4pm today. I said sure, everyone was here except D 14, she was at a friends place.

The wife then proceeded to say that she enjoyed our conversation on Friday, I agreed with her.

She then went on to say that on some days she felt very welcome by the kids and myself and other days she did not feel welcome. I replied to her that we feel the same way, we don't
here from you for several days at a time and then you just call or show up and act like no big deal. I explained that she has no idea of the emotional roller coaster ride that trouble our children. D 6 has'nt been able to put a finger directly on it but that deep down she knows what make her feel this way. D 14 and S 17 have probabbly formulated their own opinons already. And I can tell by their attitudes and for S 17 the worst report card he has ever had. I also stated that sometimes I might chanel the pain I feel into anger towards her because I don't understand her.

She mentioned that last week I did not care if we divorced any more and that seem to bother her. I said to her since this has started you have accused me of all kinds of things, and used a legal like tone when ever you please. This makes me put the armor on and become combative which we have never done in the past, we've always come up with a solution, which she agreed.

I told her that she is the one that has talked in terms of 50/50 for a while now, but has never stuck to any of the proposed options, which I felt was not fair. I told her that she is out their doing what every she pleases and know that her children are under the best care in the world. But for myself I have not been able to have much time to myself. That she has created this sitch where I don't have the luxury of knowing the children are with their mother who has given the the most exeptional care in the world, but in somebody else's care. I explained that I did not even feel like she wanted to coparent with me. She said that she has been, just acouple of instances were mentioned where D 14 and S 17 tried to play both side and she backed me up on. I told her I was grateful for that.

I went on to let her know that I wanted to know what she is feeling deep inside. That she hasn't revealed very much to myself, so that I could try and understand. She said that she felt that we never had that type of connection. I let her know that we did and I've always wanted more of this in my relationship with her. I also mentioned that I understood that maybe she got that kind of support from friends.

She went on to say that she had felt that our life together felt like it was going no where, what would it be like 10, 20, 40, years from know when were 80.

I did not get to touch on that thought she said she wasn't feeling good since yesterday, even missed work. I asked if there was anything I could do for her and she said no.

She decided that she would not come over and risk giving everyone else her cold.

So she'll come by tommorrow instead.

So she seems to be revealing just a little more info, a nice easy conversation, time will tell, a good end to a great weekend.