Just wanted to comment on a couple of things you have been talking about.
1) I think your H has been hard wired to act how he is acting from his childhood. As he has extreme feelings right now, he is at the extreme end of his scale. Your interactions with him can help him along the scale, but its still going to be how he reacts under pressure in a relationship. I get you do understand this.
2) The when to walk away question? I find this very difficult, but I think you and I have similar views on this one. Assuming no dealbreaker physical stuff etc pops up, the first off its the DB way of working on being the best person we can be. You have worked through heaps, you big one left may be your anger stuff??
Then it becomes about giving your H the opportunity to see the changes. He can be at home on a daily basis and still not be looking at you, I feel stuck on this now.
The last part, is if he sees these changes and its still not working, then its moving much closer to how much is enough. This will depend on what you are putting up with - you have a much harder home life to put up with right now.
You are sounding more confident in the last month, is your mojo returning?!
