Me-40 W-41 Together-10 M-8 S-6 S-4 Bomb 5/08 Bomb 10/08 Thought things were better, was wrong. Still living together Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
Never doubt that there is a God if you want any chance with a M being saved.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
Never doubt that there is a God if you want any chance with a M being saved.
Kevin
What about us people who do not believe in a god, Kevin? No chance for our marriages being saved?
Sorry for the threadjack, O! Congrats on the good things happening in your sitch. Just had to post a comment about something that offended.
"It is excruciating pain. It is the pain of separation, the pain of loss, the pain of dreams and expectations unrealized. It is the loss and death of a mirage."
What about us people who do not believe in a god, Kevin? No chance for our marriages being saved?
Sorry for the threadjack, O! Congrats on the good things happening in your sitch. Just had to post a comment about something that offended.
Wasn't meant to offend and of course there is always a chance of you saving your M on your own by putting in the DBing techniques.
I'm also not going to get into a discussion about whether God exists or not either on this thread. I am certainly not afraid to discuss it if you ever want to, but that would really have to be done in some other format if one felt the need to.
I hope you are able to save your M on your own.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
Thanks for the good wishes Kevin, but I am not trying to save mine. It was a collective "we". There are many people on this board who are agnostic and atheist. As for the discussion about a belief in God, thanks but no thanks. I am one who believes that people should believe in what feels right for them, but thanks for the offer.
Once again O, sorry for the threadjack!
"It is excruciating pain. It is the pain of separation, the pain of loss, the pain of dreams and expectations unrealized. It is the loss and death of a mirage."
Quote: "You don't want to hurt me, yet you keep telling me you don't love me. I don't want to break up the family either, but I want my wife to love me."
I disagree with Faithful on the quote above. I don't hear neediness in it. I hear strength. I hear someone saying what he needs out of the marriage. It implies that he has the right to choose to end the marriage if he doesn't get his needs met too. It's not all about her. I think it was the perfect thing to say.
Sara,
My point was more about the timing of Orich's statement than the content. I just question whether Orich's W is ready to hear about his needs just yet. I think it is far more productive if he wait a bit to talk to her about his needs. I also question why you think it is important that he let his W know that HE could end the marriage if he chose. Even if she didn't understand that, it sounds manipulative unless he is ready to follow through. I will admit that I am much more a proponent of the unconditional love approach than the tough love approach that some espouse. BTW, this is not a statement on where you stand because I have no idea.
Praising God Daily, Remaining "FaithfulH" Me: 62 W: 62 D:33 S:30 & 31 Married: 40 Years BD: Sep 2006 Piecing: May 2007 2nd BD: May 2014 Working On It: Today
I only said it because I wanted to clarify what she meant. Did she not want to Burt me because she wants dumping me to be easier on her, or does she not want to hurt me because she loves me. I don't think it sounded needy. Plus, that was the only thing said. She is due home in a couple of hours, and I will see what her attitude is then.
Me-40 W-41 Together-10 M-8 S-6 S-4 Bomb 5/08 Bomb 10/08 Thought things were better, was wrong. Still living together Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
Play it cool, calm, and collective when she arrives home.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
Me-40 W-41 Together-10 M-8 S-6 S-4 Bomb 5/08 Bomb 10/08 Thought things were better, was wrong. Still living together Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.