Oh thank you so much! I am going to look into those threads. It's so nice of you to think of that & give me a heads up. I am quietly doing the things I know I need to be doing. I sense that it's too soon for him to see as the full transformation has not been achieved as yet. (The transforming does not include rehoming the furbabys, but virtually everything else I can think of). At some point he'll have to come to get some tools & stuff he left behind. My challange is to be ready for that visit. And as of now, NO I am not ready for the man to walk thru my front door. I have work to do! If I am going to surprise him and cause him to pause, I have made some progress, but more is required. This is always difficult work, regardless of the circumstances. With my exh, it was frustrating cuz although he was in frequent contact he was involved with ow. My current situation involves no ow, but very infrequent contact. I know if I didn't call to check in from time to time that I would never hear from him again. So once more, it's all on me. But I am pretty good today. Missed him as usual, but it wasn't so depressing today for some reason. I see us together, so I have faith & patience. {usually! lol} Every day I want to call and every night when I realize I made it thru the day without caving into the urge is a triumph. I wish I had a dime for every time I picked up my phone with the intention to call or text him, but I manage to control myself and pass on the urge. I'm like a junky trying to stay off the stuff! I want to hold him and nuzzle my nose at his neck and breath his smell. I want to make his cerrase tea with lemon in the mornings. I want to throw my leg over him while falling asleep. He's my "drug" of choice and I'm addicted. I even miss his maniac kid, so that really says something! I actually long to see the feral child. I've got a bad hang up on this guy for real. haha
