I saw your post yesterday, but I did not have a lot of time in front of the computer then - had a mediation (not for me) that lasted all day (but we got the case settled $$) tehn had to dash home to dinner with the fam over at our sitter's "blended family's" home. Which was nice. Then the talk last night about W's job. Just enough time to post at midnight, then hit the hay.
Quote:
The Christmas/bike questions sound like a good, positive sign. Y'know, we're so accustomed to deflecting positive signs to protect ourselves from disappointments and to continue detaching - the old "yeah, and it could mean nothing at all," - that we can miss the "small changes" Michele tells us to be on the lookout for, those ever-so-slight (though often temporary) movements toward. Toward is toward (it ain't status quo and it ain't backwards).
I think you are dead on there. I think I often "note" the positive signs, but (probably defensively) am reluctant to let myself believe they are positive. Scared of being disappointed - and "scared" is not part of my plan.
So, this week (and I think my late night post last night indicates this) I have really worked on detaching, and I can feel a difference. Not callously, but I just don't care what W does/does not do or what she says/feels. I'm just letting her deal with HER issues, while I'm dealing with mine. I am still being courteous and receptive to her, but I do not DEPEND on her.
