What am I supposed to do? We've probably talked the most we've talked since this happened. He calls me with updates and talks to me about everything every night. He's fully disclosing. We seem to be really connecting. He's been very appreciative.

What you may not have seen in the posts is that she and I have talked about their telephone conversations. She was hurt and angry that I would think anything was going on between them. She said she thought I knew they were talking and was OK with it. She said I had no one else to talk to about her H.

My H is not playing MC because they are getting divorced. Her H is beyond a jerk but I won't go into that now. My H seems genuinely appreciative of the support I've shown him. He's asked me to cut him some slack because he feels he has to act as a buffer for her H.

Demanding that he not go to the hospital wouldn't do a bit of good and it just makes me look bad like I'm an uncaring B****- that I don't trust him (we just got done talking a minute ago-and I reacted to something he said and he said give me a little credit). Bottom line is I can throw a big fit and make demands and all it will do is give him ammunition against me and I guarantee you he won't do it!

I think he's had enough of his best friend. I'll be surprised if they have any kind of relationship going forward - not over her but just his friend's behavior over the last couple of years - especially how he treats my H.

The bottom line is this - I'm not being naive - my eyes are open. Again, this is hard because to go into everything would take forever you are only getting part of the picture - not every situation fits neatly into the EA scenario. I have to do what I feel is right for me. I know my H. At this point, I do feel good about the fact that he's so open with me - he really wants to talk and share things with me. I think that's positive. We haven't had that for awhile.

You're right at some point there has to be a healthy break. She's been moved to a better facility and seems to be improving. She's acknowledged that she needs help and is fully willing to get that help now. Here's the thing to you have to remember my H was in her situation several years ago so he knows exactly how it feels to be in that much pain and be suicidal. That's where his empathy comes from.

I really feel that this is the right course of action for me right now. You can always say I told you so later on if I'm wrong.

Here's the thing - I do want to restore my marriage and make it better than it's ever been. I can only control my own behavior -not his or anyone else's. What I do know now is that if my marriage doesn't work out I will be fine. Sure it will hurt and it will be hard on our sons but we'll all get through it. The positive changes I'm making are helping me to gain more and more self-confidence each day.

I'm going to stay the course right now. I know you're shaking your head but again this feels right to me. I'm sorry if I'm disappointing you.