I just called another attorney. I am going in tomorrow. I feel sick about it...enough analyzing or judging myself for my feelings. It is just who I am. To have what I thought was a lifetime partnership devolve into a purely legal and logistical matter...well, you all know how I feel.
S6 was a wreck today. My own dad was nearly in tears seeing how wiped out and sad he was.
Lots came out, particularly (after hours of berating me and screaming) that he misses me when he is with daddy, pause...and he misses daddy when he is with me and he doesn't miss anyone when we are all together.
We were a together family and it shows in the response of my children. That is the real tragedy, despite our times of dysfunction and turmoil our kids always knew we would get through it together...well, they "knew"...
I am ok. So wiped out, hard to have the energy to deal with a raving child. But he is now swimming with a friend and jovial.
He got so much out with me and despite my intermittent urges to drop him off with his dad and let him deal with it, I know that S6 needs to know that I am here and I can "handle it."
I need as much support as I can get moving forward and I consider you all my friends.
