Not much change with my dad... unresponsive to commands and sleeps most of the day. Waiting the results of more tests. I'm hoping for the best but prepared for the worst. We've been singing him songs, and talking to him a lot. Today he just wanted to sleep, and snore!
My mom has turned this all over to God, and has said repeatedly that we just have to wait on the Lord and pray. I told her when she says those things I think about my H and that the same advice applies... Wait on God, and pray.
I can not fathom how my H, who left me 5 mths ago and hasn't filed for D yet and used to do so much for my parents and vice versa, could receive email updates and text messages and not show more empathy or concern. At my sister's suggestion, I sent a text yesterday that if he wanted to see dad we wanted him to feel welcome to do so, and if he didn't want to that was okay too. The email updates are going to all of the friends/family, so it's a group message but no response.
My attitude switches daily, or during the day. Sometimes I feel sorry for H - his depression and/or MLC must really be consuming him to not reach out. Other times I'm angry - how could he be so self centered and cruel? And sometimes I'm just feeling sorry for myself - what did I do to deserve this? I know that's not it and in many ways this isn't happening to me, it's happening to my dad and to my H. They have battles to fight and I'm an observer who cares.
I wonder if anyone has any thoughts about a WAS that doesn't reach out during a really, really tough time like this. Is it most likely the fog or depression or whatever that doesn't allow them to recognize the hurt they're causing or even feel connected? Or do they know it's hurtful but feel they have to see their plan of S or D through, despite the cost?
I assume the advice would be to remember I can only control myself, focus on my PMA and taking care of myself and the kids... All good thoughts but it's hard to stop the feelings about my H and wondering... I don't know how to turn it off. I have to stop looking at FB too. We aren't FB friends but I've been noting when he adds friends... mostly men and seem to be ski-industry buddies. All more indications he plans to move in the fall and put even more distance btw us. I told myself tonight I have to stop looking for info on H... it only makes me feel worse.
