MotoB, are you still active duty military? If you are then she can lose all of her benefits if she dates and people find out about it, even if you arent the one to report it. According to the military you are married until a judge says you are not. Also, on your side, you dont date, or even look like you might be possibly thinking about it, no matter what, until a judge says that you are no longer married.

I think that you were fine to confront the guy, and even if there is something going on between them, you will probably have put a hiccup in their works. But I really didnt get the feeling that an A was involved, could be wrong of course, but who knows at this point.

I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...