Thanks so much for your response IWill. I couldn't agree with you more that my husband needs to seek some kind of treatment. He has been on Paxil for the past 10+ years since his last episode. He was on various other meds that did not seem to help him much, I don't remember the names of them. He still takes the Paxil, but I know when someone is on a medication for a long time it can often stop working. So on top of all the career struggles he is having, his age and if the medication he takes no longer works for him...he is once again in a major depressive episode.
He's also the kind of person who does not like to be given advice...especially from me at this particular moment. He seems to do better when he comes to the right conclusion (that yes I need help) himself which is what happened the last time we went through this. I think he finally determined he couldn't shake it on his own. He really is a great guy when he is not depressed..but not only is there a family history of depression in his family, but he has always been a "glass half empty" kind of person.
He is currently employed as a Firefighter EMT so he has the medical knowledge regarding what depression is etc. Again it's hard to help those that won't help themselves. He gets very restless also when he is like this. Now he talks about wanting to move to another part of the country. Doesn't like the long winters where we currently live (upper midwest). Of course we have a 14 year old daughter who wants nothing to do with moving as she wants to stay close to her friends. I feel like I'm in a catch 22. Want to make husband happy, but don't want to hurt my daughter either. It's very tough. I guess I need to just do one day at a time. I guess my first thing is just to get him to come home again. In the mean time I'm trying to stay level headed and not be emotional at all in his presence.
Thanks so much for your support and kind words. It's nice to know that there are many people out there going through the same thing. It's just too bad it has to be that way.
