I am starting a now thread becasue I know the other is going to lock at any moment....
It’s Me Doc……….Remember me?????
Well I am a little afraid to post because things are going good. Been doing a lot of work outside and being Portuguese I tan really easy. (Could never figure out people paying to go to a tanning booth). Anyway I am not really sure why but I did take my wedding ring off a few weeks ago. Partly because of my tanning I did not what to have the “He took his ring off” white mark in my finger. I am kind of at a point that if my marriage ends I don’t want to be “marked” for awhile. But I am not planning on it ending I am a little indifferent about it right now. So with that said I had the best Anniversary in 2 years. I did not fret about getting W a present instead I got her card and 10 red roses (from me) and 10 pink roses (from son) to equal the 20 years we have been together. We went to San Fran. For the day. Started out at Alcatraz Island. The “tour” lasted 4 hours (seemed like 10 mins) walking around I took every opportunity to put my arm around wife and though her arm when she had her hand in her pocket. I had son take a picture of wife and I and instead of just standing next to her this time I put my arm around her. While we were on the island I did notice she had put her wedding rings back on for this trip. Later we had a fabulous lunch / dinner on fisherman’s wharf and then went to the wax museum and to Riplies Believe it or not. (Holding hands for about 2 blocks)When we got home I kissed her and thanked her for the beautiful day. I know I have tried many things but what I think is working is what I want to call the ‘DB two step”. You see in the past I would take two steps forward and come on too strong and wife would send me three steps back. So what I am doing now is taking two steps forward and then stepping back one…. Like I left the picture of wife and I on the mirror in the bathroom the other morning with the caption. “What a cute couple…Lets get back together” but did not say anything else about it until evening and then I Joked about it and she laughed. I have found that My W is not a morning person so NO R TALK IN THE MORNING. I have even been able to joke with her Sexually. In the past she would just get into a bad mood kind of “Mad” at me. This morning I put the rubber ducks I bought awhile ago when I was going to do the “Bubble Bath thing” (Remember?). On the bathroom sink with her name on them. Tonight I am going to asked if she liked the ducks. I will tell her they are for when she trusts ME again I will give her that Bubble bath I was going to give her…. As for work??? Nothing yet. I am took this class that has a test that tells you what you should do for a living.. I came back with….Political manager, Marketing Personnel, sales Agent, Journalist, Actor, Computer Systems Analyst, Mortgage Broker, Physician, Urban Planner, Entrepreneur, Prosthetic assistant and last Public relations Still trying to find a retraining program that will help pay for the Computer systems analyst classes I want to take. well got ta go.. Son wants to go swimming.. IT’S 9:00 at NIGHT…. it’s 62 Degrees out side but the pool is about 75
Night Doc
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
Well this afternoon Wife asked me where the rubber ducks came from and what they were for . I said "remember when we went to the Indian casino and we stayed at our time share? I went up the day before and then you were supposed to come up and I was going to go back home that night to stay with son? I was going to have a nice hot bubble bath with candles all set up for you when you arrived so you could enjoy the bath after I left. But things changed and you were not able to come up that night. What are they for? Well when you feel you can trust ME again I want to complete that task and give you a bubble bath. I know you are in no shape to do it right now (her back went out yesterday). But latter.." She chuckled and said "I have not had a bath in years.(she takes showers). It would be hard for me to get out” I said “not if I help you” She smiled …
So I left it at that. now it’s time for me to take a step back…let the dust settle and then my next move after she gets her back fixed is to suggest… “How about that bubble bath?” Two steps forward and one step back I am still advancing
If you wake up and dont want to smile, If it takes just a little while, Open your eyes and look at the day, Youll see things in a different way.
Dont stop, thinking about tomorrow, Dont stop, itll soon be here, Itll be, better than before, Yesterdays gone, yesterdays gone.
They call me Doctor Love
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
Me and my inner Stevie (and Christine)....LOVE IT!!!
Thanks Sg it means allot coming from you.The hardest part is me and my attitude. As long as I can keep on the Up beat and not sweat the little things it will be Ok. I did mess up a little the other night though. Wife and I were watching a movie and this married woman started kissing her old BF. I left the room. I know the A was another time and another place. I feel wife has let it go.. But until W re commits and we "reconnect" I will deep down inside feel like the third wheel in this sitch.
My dream? Wife and I call the OM together and say get lost. What I can settle for?. Her commitment to ME and her just telling me it will not happen again.
Later... Got to go spread some positive me around..
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
OT has a very good point there - a wonderfully annoying trait of hers. Which is why her insights are so valuable.
Reading your updates it seems the tension has shifted a bit to "what do I do next?" I wish I had some answers for you - some signs to look out for but regrettably I don't. I do hope that things turn around for you on this front as well as the job front soon...
Me 52, STBEX 52 D 17, S 12 M 20 years Em Sep since 2002, Phys Sep Sept 2009
" Why would W recommit when she is still lacking a lover? I wouldn't marry anyone who was not my lover. Would you?
Ot... I know what you are saying and we are almost there. I can finely touch her without her cringing. I can finley joke with her without her getting PO'ed. She has seen the change in me and I am seeing the changes in her. Day, “Reading your updates it seems the tension has shifted a bit to "what do I do next?"” It may have come off that way to you but really it’s THIS IS WHAT I AM DOING NEXT. Back to you OT. EVERYONE is different and the only thing you all know about my W is what I have said. NO two sitches are the same…
I think and I know “hope4” said it in his sitch. “I can’t put my finger on it but she is holding back” It’s like not taking the last cookie.. You know you want it but something stops you from taking it. I know she wants my cookie but had talked her out of taking it. She has let down her wall. It’s still there a little but it’s no longer made of stone more like paper now..
Soon OT and Day. Real soon.. We are at the flirting stage right now which is pretty good being that two years ago we were disgusted with each other. And you know what flirting leads to…
OT you are right about the moving back into our room. I am no longer pushing that.. I want to seduce her back…
AND I not only have the R on my plate now I have money, job search and possibly going back to school…kind of nice really though it gives me a break for the R worries..
Doc
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
. I said "remember when we went to the Indian casino and we stayed at our time share? I went up the day before and then you were supposed to come up and I was going to go back home that night to stay with son? I was going to have a nice hot bubble bath with candles all set up for you when you arrived so you could enjoy the bath after I left. But things changed and you were not able to come up that night. 
She smiled …
