Religion can always be a touchy subject between spouses - especially two estranged spouses. Perhaps you can ask your priest for advice on how to approach this with your W.
What we all want for you is to obtain, use and implement the tools needed for you to accept this situation, be strong for yourself and your girls, cut the neediness out of your life, stop scheming for ways to impress/attract your wife, detach and realize you can and will be happy w/o your W. If you do that through religion, AA or C'ing, well, whatever works. There are many approaches and none are more right than the other. The spiritual approach is important but if it is not providing you with the tools you need then you should incorporate another form of *something* be it C'ing, group support or whatever it is you think is best.
You still mind read, speculate and try and control the situation and you still have expectations. You backslide way too often for being as far along as you are in your separation and your W still controls most of your thoughts, ideas and motivations. If your church is helping you obtain the tools to curb these issues then great. If not, keep up with the church to bolster your spiritual side but find another outlet to get what you need for these issues.
