K4D Rising #4

[K4D]

To answer your questions... No. I am no longer going to AA or counseling. I have been going to a priest each Monday night. I found that looking at things from a spiritual side is much stronger and better. I am able to talk with him about stuff and he is helping me out in a few different area's. I felt like I needed spiritual guidance. The AA meeting that I went to really had a lot of screwed up people in it and it seemed like half of the conversation was F this and F that, etc. Just didn't feel like that was somewhere I should be after thinking it over.

On top of that, alcohol does not have power over me anymore. It used to. It no longer does. It does not control me. I can avoid it with ease now.

I did meet with my priest again last night and that seems to be helping me. I am reading a lot and listening to sermons, etc. Just because I had a down day or 2 doesn't mean I have turned back into the old Kevin. I'm doing fine today.

CG, I know that W is seething because she detests the catholic church and has made no secret of it to me many times and she also threatened months ago to give me problems with the kids if I took them to mass. So I am not speculating on that one. I know firmly where she stands on that.

I'm not sure what I am doing to try and impress her. My stand for the church I am going to is not to impress her. I know how much she is against it.

Ok, yes, lifting weights would be to try and make myself more attractive to her. I don't see a problem there as DBing tells us to make ourselves more attractive to our S. That is just one of the ways in which I can do that. And I will get some health benefits out of it anyways.

Stuck808, whether or not I was wondering if she was interested in me is beside the point. I have no intention of taking her up on anything should she be interested in me. It is flattering if she is and the thought had crossed my mind wondering if she is. But nothing will come of it because I am not pursuing it.

Tomato, I'm glad you are getting to go to the prayer tonite with the standers. Thank you for making sure I am included in those prayers.

Everyone say what yall will. This is the path I have chosen. I am focusing on my spiritual side and yes, I do still pray for my M to be restored. I'm not going to stop praying for that. I also pray that I make the changes needed for myself and my family. I pray for the standers for their M's to be restored as well as many M's on DBing. I do things with friends. I avoid situations now that could put me in a tempting situation.

I try to put my faith in God as much as possible. It doesn't mean I don't have bad days or wonder if anything will ever change.

But I really try to stick to the core things of the church the more I learn.

I feel like I am finally finding the right path for me through the church and through the standers. I still need a hobby besides poker. I am working on that one. Dancing is becoming one of those hobbies. That is fun.

I fully expect to get 2X4's but that is ok. I am comfortable with my stance.

Kevin