This is very simple. She has NO intention of EVER being with you again. Take that for what its worth, but that is the REASON. Why search any further for any reason? It is perfectly logical.
This is I know.
This I disagree with. It's not perfectly logical. "I no longer want to be married to SP. He was not there when I needed him. I do not believe I can count on him." That's one thing. For (true) friends and for family, it ought to be sufficient.
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And secondly, you keep bringing up that she said X to her sister when you clearly said Y...but in fact, you did not talk directly TO her sister and you don't know what was said.
While it is true that I did not speak to her sister, I now have had a SECOND mutual friend of SIL and myself more or less confront me with the same story. That seems pretty solid evidence to me.
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Furthermore, you keep p*ssyfooting around about alimony, when you know very clearly that your WAW WANTS YOU TO STATE AN AMOUNT, and by not stating an amount, you are forcing her to assume the worst.
I am not pussyfooting around -- I DO NOT KNOW WHAT AN APPROPRIATE AMOUNT SHORT OF THE STATE-DEFINED LEVEL IS. And she doesn't want to pay that. And I told her that I would, in fact, consider taking less than the state-defined level (which is a lot), in the interest of pushing this thing through and not bankrupting her and demonstrating my good faith to being cooperative and because the number seems very high to me and and and.
Which, since you follow the thread so closely, you already know, because I have said so here, and which you already know I have told WAW ad infinitum.
My position on alimony has been consistent -- until I have a thorough read on MY financial position (in jeopardy due to job cuts) and on HOW MUCH maintenance of the house requires -- data she still hasn't completely provided me -- I am in no position to say anything more substantial than "a million dollars a month" or "a dollar a year."
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you seem determined to demonize what she is saying and doing, versus seeing it how it looks from the outside
