I'm sure Mach will explain, I think he may mean the more you let your H go to work on his issues the further he may drift for a time.
Good for you on the expectations, stay in the here and now. I think the card is a good idea. I know as much as you would like to show him by making your anniversary special, he will most likely view it as pressure. The special days like this are tough, do something nice for yourself instead.
It's hard to look around and see all the other families together. I still have a hard time with this when I take the kids out to dinner or shopping.
Allow yourself to feel this and let it pass. Try in some way to use it as motivation....one of your goals. When your patience seems to be running thin or when that doubt starts to creep in. Remember seeing these families, use it as a reminder of what your standing for and be proud of that.
