Today, D asked if she could go home early b/c she missed her mommy. After talking about it to see if something was wrong or if she was upset, etc., I said, ok and we called X.
X and I talked and I gave her 2 pm as a good time that would allow us to have lunch and still hang out a bit before taking her back. X asked to talk w/D and asked D if she'd like to be picked up at 1:30.
I got the phone back and asked her why she did that b/c I had said (and we had agreed on 2). She just said ok and nothing else.
I just have to say that really ticks me off b/c the two adults agreed on a time but X went behind my back to the child to try and manupulate a different, earlier pickup.
I almost just want to force D to stay here, but won't do that b/c it isn't about me but its about her. However, I will be texting X to let her know I am disappointed.
Sent the text...no reply. Told X in the text that I was disappointed she and I had agreed on a time then she presented an earlier time to D. I told her we need to leave our child our of these discussions.
Dropped off D...nothing said.
Said hello and asked new BF how he was doing and he coldly stared straight ahead and said "fine."
X never said a word about anything.
It is disappointing that she wants to have the wall up all the time. I know it is because I'm seeing someone now and am happy, but it is still disappointing.
I'm probably too optimistic in thinking we can have a cordial relationship that keeps the needs of our D first and foremost.
I can only control what I can do on my end, so I know D will at least get one of her parents who is constantly thinking of the impact his actions have on her.
On another note, I'm very sad as my vet doesn't think there is anything that can be done to heal up my little dog. She's in the process of talking w/human neurologists about it, but if he can't be cured and has no chance of getting better, then I have no choice but to put him down.
Neither of us can live w/his rear end leaking feces all the time. Even when I put him in his kennel, he ends up sleeping in his own filth. No one or nothing should have to live like that.
It would be the right thing to do for him, but I'm still praying for a miracle that can keep him alive. He's the little guy who has been there for me through all of this garbage.
So, I'm a bit blue as I'm constantly thinking about it these days.
*hugs*.. Pets are invaluable and so loving, and he has a great companion looking out for him. *hugs*
"So, I'm a bit blue as I'm constantly thinking about it these days."
The helplessness you feel for your pooch can open up all the other emotional wounds you're carrying. This might explain why it's constantly in your thoughts and bringing greater sorrow. Take a deep breath, Rob. This is tough, keep your focus and know you're loved.
As far as dealing with ex, you're a wise man to know to what let slide. Bravo.
I'm hoping he'll make it through this too, but I'm preparing for the worst. Time will tell, but I'm not too optimistic right now. Trying to stay positive.
As for the interaction w/the X, I wanted to make sure that I set up boundaries w/her as to what I'd stand for and what I won't. Her trying to manipulate our D isn't a trend I want to continue.
However, I can't stop what she does nor will I try. But what I will do - and did - was to make sure she knew I saw through her rouse and would not be a willing participant.
Yes, the dog situation is tearing me apart. I agree that it has caused all of my emotions to be a bit more sensitive as well right now. I am hoping for the best for him, but regardless, I need to have some conclusion to the situation as it is very difficult on both of us.
As for the X, I am working hard at choosing my battles wisely, but as I said to Kerry, I thought her attempts at manipulation were completely wrong, so I called her on it yesterday.
Even if she isn't responding to what I say, at least she knows where I stand. In fact, I'm completely comfortable w/confronting her on things right now. I hope I can stay this way, to be honest, as it allows me to process what is bothering me and move on right away.
She is still so angry and even more so since she found out I have a GF. I knew it would occur, but wasn't really sure what I'd be facing when it came.
Last night, X sent me a text asking what had happened w/D's nose. I asked for clarification and she came back w/an accusation of wrong-doing on my part as D had three scratches on her nose that she got when she was w/me.
I guessed as what could have happened but explained that D never complained about it and I didn't notice them either. I gave some possible suggestions and asked X to talk w/D about it and get back to me.
Well, of course I heard nothing, so I called and got D. D said she had remembered bumping it on the wall of the pool and had told X about it last night.
Of course, X never bothered to contact me and tell me the issue was solved because the story didn't end the way she had wanted it to...she was hoping to have me at fault for something negligent.
I was perfectly fine w/letting the public take out their frustration for the economy on the Obama Administration, but now that you've volunteered to remind everyone that it was MY FAULT for the global economic meltdown, I'll be all over the cable news channels again!
Hey Rob, Sorry to hear about your pup...wish things could get better for the little guy...but I know you'll do what is best.
That's too bad about the newest phase of passive-aggressive behavior from your X - though I think you're handling it the best way - staying calm, sticking to the facts, not allowing her to lure you into an interaction on her terms. I don't know if its rational or not - but my STBX seems to have the same tendency of assuming that whatever she wants for S2 is in his best interest - and so if/when I disagree, she takes it to mean that I don't have his best interests at heart. She lives according to her own little dogmatic line of reasoning.
How did she learn about your GF?
When you get a chance, would you fix the economy, please?
