its going to be a long night.i broke out the bottle and put on some good music.ah music.the w and i loved all types of music.kinda hard to find something that doesnt bring back memories.during the day i bust my but working which is a great distraction from all thats going on in my life.nights are harder when i dont have the kids.big house.just me and the cat.i try to do stuff around the house until the wee hours until im tired enough to pass out.sleep is the best time.doing my best though.doing LRT the best i can.in my mind i know she is probably not coming back but in the back of my mind i still have this glimmer of hope.i wish i could just cut that out along with all memories of her.i know there is really nothing i can do in all this except take care of myself.sorry but i just needed to vent and writing makes me feel better.I know im not alone out there.
