I want my Monkey and Sheep Back

[beepee]

Journaling..

back from my IC appt and it was good. talked about my feelings about the H, my insecurities with my appearance and how that is the main issue that i have that prevents me from being content, and she taught me some breathing techniques as well. all in all, it was a good session.

so this is going to be a bit gross, so a warning before you read!! i think i know why my ADs arent totally kicking it and im worried that im having stomach problems. ive been getting diarrhea EVERYDAY since the H left and it might be due to the medication or because of my daily food intake, im not sure. but when i get the diarrhea, i see 2 white pills and im assuming thats the AD, im pretty positive it is. so no wonder its not working, it gets flushed out of my system right after i take it! im really worried, that shouldnt be happening.. i must to talk to my prescriber about it and maybe talk to my doctor about my stomach problems. ive been in the ER before due to horrible stomach pains and theyve never been able to find anything but i always feel iffy there and i always get sharp stabbing pains there too. i dont want to worry myself and get down anymore than i already am so i am going to stop worrying about it but i know its definitely a problem that needs to be dealt with.

im seeing my prescriber on friday so ill talk to her about it then and see what can be done. i realy hope theres no underlying problems with my stomach and that maybe my body is just not adjusting well to the medication..

enough about that, i dont want to worry myself.
i have so much to do today but i dont want to do it!! i know i have to. theres the embarrassingly messy room, the laundry i never did, the ebay auctions i never put up, more jobs to apply for, calls to make concerning overdue bills, etc etc etc.
i think ill start with cleaning my room and playing some music thatll get my going.

no word from the job yet, hoping to hear somethng soon. if not, oh well, something better will come up im sure!