A Little Epiphany - (and a newbie delurking)

[Dia]

Hi, everyone,

Fallgirl, Sandi and GIMA - thank you for your comments.

This post is just a quickie as I'm in the middle of a bunch of stuff, but I had a good chat with both the kidlet and the H this morning. Not relationship stuff, just upbeat day-to-day stuff with lots of affirmation and praise for H thrown in. I wasn't good enough about that at times, and he seems to really glow with it when I do it now.

Kidlet is a perceptive little monkey! He's 9 and going into 4th grade. He (kidlet) was telling me how he'd been playing this video game his dad made (H is a programmer). I drew him out on it, asking him about his characters and what kind of stuff you could do in the game. Kidlet told me to get paper and pencil and then wait a minute while he asked his dad a question. When he came back to the phone, kidlet gave me the url for the game!

I was surprised, so I asked the kidlet if giving me the address was his own idea or his Dad's. Kidlet said it was his own idea, that when I heard about it I sounded like I might want to play it. Smart kidlet!! And even better, the only people who are in that game right now are H, kidlet and a good mutual friend of ours. The question kidlet had asked his dad was to write down the url so he could give it to me, so H must have wanted me to have it.

After kidlet got off the phone, I praised H for making the game and told him how interesting it sounded, how I was looking forward to trying it, etc. Even better, once I HAVE tried it, I'll be able to give him more praise and affirmation for it.

We also talked about my impending move, and how I'm debating about a possible PT job offer with a really low salary. It wouldn't be enough for me to live on independently, even with child support. The advantage of taking it is that if I do, our son gets a free ride at the pricey, prestigious private school where the position is located. It would also give me first dibs at moving into something FT as soon as it opened up and there's some possibility of them tailoring a position especially for me if I can just get in and get a foothold.

One of the really obvious solutions to this is for H to invite me to come back to the house - but I have NOT asked directly. I'm worried that it would be too much, too soon and too much pressure on both of us. Either way, I think he needs to be the one to make the invitation.

Have a great day everyone!!