It was the big move at the weekend. H worked so unbelievably hard all day for me. We carried washing machines, fridge/ freezers, double beds everything for my new place together. We were both shattered but we managed to do it in two van loads and he didn't get back to his place till 1am. We had a really good day together again and had a long lunch in the middle which I bought as a thank you. He paid for the van for moving me and wouldn't even let me pay for petrol.
I guess things to note were that he wouldn't really look at me properly and I do feel like he has barriers up so that we won't reconnect. He worked so hard at disconnecting from me that summer when he left and he is still having to work actively to stay disconnected. He didn't really give much away emotionally, although when we left the house for the final time I commented that I felt a bit weird and he said him too. In the car I said 'I'm really glad that we're friends' and he looked me straight in the eye and said 'him too'. We had a bit of drama when we got to the new place and as we shut the cat in the bathroom while we unloaded and she escaped through a door which I didn't know was there and went under the floorboards. That was just when he was leaving and he offered to stay and was beside himself with worry. When he left I managed to get her out as she knows and trusts me rather than him and he was still sitting in the van outside on the phone. I went out there and said I'd got her and we kind of held onto each others arms (as hugging was impossible) like we didn't want to let go of each other, I guess a mixture of relief and mutual bonding.
A funny thing was that when we took a load of junk to the dump, the guy that was there was chatting to me and said 'you and your partner' and I replied that he wasn't my partner and the guy said 'oh, in that case can I have your number?' I declined politely but h asked what we were talking about and so I told him. He looked really surprised but when we were driving away he asked again if the guy had really asked for my number. I like the fact that it played on his mind lol.
We have exchanged a quite a few texts over the past few days. However, since being out of the house he has played less on my mind. I am loving the new place and the new area and I think I will be happy there. I guess, on the move day I was the most natural I have ever been with h and I didn't cry or get upset or casue any kind of scene. Just concentrated on having a good day.
Also some positives are that he called our cat by our old pet name for her in a text - he can show emotion to her then! And he seems intent on still keeping me in his life and doesn't seem to want to lose touch in the future - we'll see on that one.
The garden party at Buckingham Palace was amazing. The gardens are just lovely and so amazing to have such an oasis in central London, there is so much wildlife there! You don't normally get to see the gardens if you are just visiting as they aren't open to the public so this was a rare chance for me.
When we arrived we walked through the gardens and made our way to the lawn. At 4pm the Queen came out of the Palace wearing bright pink, so was easy to see, followed by Prince Phillip and other minor royals. I saw Prince and Princess Michael of Kent and one other guy I recognised but couldn't place. Then we went over to the area where Princess Alexandra (the Patron of my charity) was and waited until she came over to see us. She didn't remember any of us but when we said where were from she got very excited. I had sent biogs of us (me and 3 trustees) over and she had clearly read and absorbed them. It turns out she had known (and I think had a soft spot/ romance with) one of the Trustees FIL.
After then the Royals moved to the Royal tea tent and we went for tea in the main tent. The food was lovely but very tiny! Cucumber sandwiches (no crusts!), tiny scones and jam and cake. I got a bit bored standing around making small talk with my Trustees but did some people watching and there was a really good band playing and we walked around a bit. After tea, we stood and watched the Queen leave and then left ourselves. All in all, it was lots of fun. I'm so glad I got to go!
Here is a link to some pics I found on the web of the day
I'm so glad the move went well and tha you're settling in to the new place OK. Interesting that H was thinking about the guy at the dump asking for your number- it must have been preying on his mind, I agree.
And wow on the Queen's pink outfit- sounds like it was an experience to dine out on for years to come!
Hey ((Julia)), Sounds like you were fantastic on moving day. Kept your cool like a pro. Bravo!! Wow, you sure hauled a lot of stuff!! I'm not surprised your H felt uneasy, a lot of guilt on his part. Good to hear you like your new place.
That is so crazy that the guy at the dump asked you for your number. Yep, keep your H guessing. What would he have done, if you would have said you gave him your number? Hehehe .... I would have loved to see the look on his face.
Ok, I thought the garden party was a joke ..... guess I missed something! Definitely, an event to remember, even if it was a bit boring at times.
Good to hear your cat just got lost in the house & not during the move - whew.
Me39, XH45 Kids 3 dogs, 2 cats Divorced 6/4/09 Tricky thing is not how you live, but how you live with yourself. (POTC)
As you may know, there is a tea blend created for the Queen...Buckingham Palace Garden Party .... Earl Grey mixed with Jasmine and other stuff.....it's my favorite!
sg Love is PATIENT, love is KIND, LOVE never fails / DB since 2001
I am so glad that you got your move over with and that you came through the day with H with flying colors. Keep him thinking. For some reason they never seem to think that someone else might find us attractive. What a shock to their fog filled world!!
hugs, kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
(((OD, Mishka)))) The outfit was certainly interesting but at least she stood out lol!
(((MsM, Cas, Kat))) Yes being asked out at the dump was amusing and a good touch. It was interesting. I thought the very same as you Kat, from the look of his face, incredulity that someone else might find me attractive. Maybe some day he will learn to open his eyes to me again - he's missing out big time!
(((SG))) I've never heard of that tea. There is a Twinnings tea shop round the corner, I might buy some for the office.
I've had a big weekend again this weekend. My sister got married which caused some mixed feelings for me. Obviously I am so thrilled for her and her new husband is perfect for her. It was a wonderful day but there were challenges there like seeing old family friends and relatives that I hadn't seen since my wedding and also being the only single person there! At the end, the last dance came and everyone coupled up and I was kind of stood there about to sneak out to the bathroom and my Mum put her arm round me and said her, me and my Dad could dance together. I know she meant well and it was so sweet but honestly not good for the PMA. Luckily at that point everyone joined hands around the happy couple so I was saved from that. However, I wore a total 180 new dress and everyone commented one it. My sister gave me an extra special mention in her speech as we have become so much closer, which is a nice by-product of the split with h, and I was so touched. Any all in all it was a lovely day.
I am LOVING my new house and living back in London again. I realised how down that house made me and how isolated I felt. I am so glad that I made the move, even though it wasn't what I wanted. Under the circumstances it was the best thing I could have done.
So glad the wedding was special for you. Reading your posts I know you are a person of warmth and integrity. You show such wonderful maturity and insight and it will be these wonderful gifts that will lead you to that 'perfect' relationship once again.
I am sure the wedding offered many blessings as well as those challenges all of us recently single experience. At the last wedding I went to I attached myself to a good friend and her husband and I swore I would never go to another wedding alone again! Last week an invitation arrived and I've already replied to say I'd love to come........and this time my friend and her H are not invited so it will certainly be a huge challenge!!
