H doesn`t want to discuss finance. He`s insisting on us continuing to keep our accounts as they are-most of savings in his name-while requesting that I pick up more bills! Crazy stuff.I`ve stood my ground on the picking up more bills issue. Just waiting for another window to insist that we change to paying into joint acc for household stuff, and fixed bills and also looking fro more transparency from him re receipts etc. He never leaves receipts around and managed to have cash only transactions for his recent trip away.
All I can do re A is keep tabs-a simple diary of his absences to build up a pattern.
He has an online email address and cell phone bill goes to work so no joy there.
Spying on him will only dribve me crazy though. I don`t want to be the angry wife at home. Want to keep things light around here as,believe me we`ve had enough of the heavy stuff already. At this stage I just begin to shake if we have a confrontation.
If he is in an A, it can`t be much of one as he is incapable of having much of a relationship with anyone, least of all himself at this moment. There`s no depth no him right now-just intense anger/sadness.
I`ve been the strong parent fro my three kids right from the begining. I`m really minding myself, don`t you worry, I really got the hang of that after a lot of ill health prior to Xmas and in lots of ways I`m building myself into the kind of wife H always wanted-looking good(too important to him!) light hearted, doing fun things, enjoying a reasonable social life and just ignoring his humours.
I`ve always wondered though if he needs the actual boot out the door to make him realise what a mess he`s making of his life.
And yes, I`m very mindful of not getting sucked into his drama. Kicking him out of here is one sure way to do that.
