H just came in and asked me to clear the computer room for him so he can move in it. I told him I would not but that if he needs assistance, I can help.
I am going to get the heck out of dodge with S today. S just told me H told him he loves him and that they will be spending a day together this week and H has something planned for them in 2 weeks.
Me: 39 H: 39 S: 15 M: 18 years Bomb: 6/3/09 H moved out: 10/15/09 H moved back:5/30/10
You are doing great and this last conversation proved it...
I am proud of you not crying as well...
I have taken to going to the Church parking lot and having a cry there almost every day at lunch...
I do wonder if the tears will ever stop falling...
I agree with Giving....
Never make a decision based on emotion and you have been here long enough to know that...
It is really hard...
This has got to be the hardest thing I have ever done in my life (and there are days I want to give up, give up on him, give up on us and give up on life and you know that from my thread) but oh so worth it for me...
Yes I said me...
Not him, not us...
ME
May All Who Seek To Take My Life Be Put To Shame And Confusion; May All Who Desire My Ruin Be Turned Back In Disgrace. ~Psalm 40:14~
Thank you Puppy, GIMA, Gardener & Serenity for your support and encouragement.
I've decided my life has become Monster vs. Alien (i.e. H vs. H) and I never know who'll show up.
H ran an errand, comes home and kisses me. (???) H said he wasn't in the mood to work at his 2nd job. I said he was welcome to join S and I. He asked what we were doing. After I told him, H said he is going to work for just a couple hours but what S and I were doing sounded like a lot of fun. When H leaves, again a kiss then "love you." I responded "love you" before even thinking about it.
I am going to go have fun with S. I'm going to put this morning out of my mind as much as possible. S and I deserve some happiness this afternoon.
Me: 39 H: 39 S: 15 M: 18 years Bomb: 6/3/09 H moved out: 10/15/09 H moved back:5/30/10
H just came in and asked me to clear the computer room for him so he can move in it. I told him I would not but that if he needs assistance, I can help.
I've just learned that OW is on my H's friends list on FB. She blocked me so I can't see it but everyone else in our family can, including my S.
I am so ticked right now I can't see straight. I am about to post something on his wall for all to see. I shouldn't right? I am really thinking I should right now because this goes beyond disrespectfulness and I am SO TIRED OF BEING DUMPED ON and treated like a d@mn fool!
Last edited by Ashlee; 07/19/0912:21 AM.
Me: 39 H: 39 S: 15 M: 18 years Bomb: 6/3/09 H moved out: 10/15/09 H moved back:5/30/10
I've just learned that OW is on my H's friends list on FB. She blocked me so I can't see it but everyone else in our family can, including my S.
I am so ticked right now I can't see straight. I am about to post something on his wall for all to see. I shouldn't right? I am really thinking I should right now because this goes beyond disrespectfulness and I am SO TIRED OF BEING DUMPED ON and treated like a d@mn fool!
let it go. take the high road. you'll respect yourself in the morning.
M60 H52 D20 M14 yrs OW-old gf from 1986 bomb-5/18/08 H filed for D-9/10/08 D final 4/24/09 xH remarried (not OW) 2012
Do nothing. 48 Hour Rule. If it is a good course of action, it will still be so this time Monday. Time is always your friend.
Except: it's boundary time again. Now. She should not be accessible for your son to see. Period. He can put in his list of who can see and add one of those "Except For" entries or whatever it's called. Not a discussion. Tell him you expect him to do so promptly.
Breathe. Rant here if you must rant.
You've been DBing so admirably. Don't give him power over you, your emotions, your (re)actions.
Gardener
"My soul, be satisfied with flowers, With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them In the one garden you may call your own." Cyrano deBergerac
I know you guys are right but I am so PISSED. That effing piece of scum...I hate both of them right now. I hate this sh!t he's putting me through. How the he11 does he do this to someone he once loved? HOW?
Damn!t...I get home from a great day with S to find this. H isn't here. If he was I think I'd go off on him.
I really can't stand my life at this moment...it doesn't feel like anything in worth it anymore. I'm a d@mn fool.
Me: 39 H: 39 S: 15 M: 18 years Bomb: 6/3/09 H moved out: 10/15/09 H moved back:5/30/10