Trying to cope with H, IA/EA (was Newbie-1st post)

[Faith2010]

When H got back from his run, he hugs me. H says he's confused etc. We sit down in the family room and H talks about his feelings, how confused he is, that he can't take it anymore and feels he needs to make a decision, either way etc... I listened. Yes, just listened. I thought of this board and the threads I have read and kept my mouth shut. IT WAS HARD! H would say something so off the wall or something to make me want to scream and defend but I kept it all in. I just kept replaying in my head "Listen to him, really listen. Look at him in the eyes and listen."

I did talk when H asked me where I was at. I said I am taking it one day at a time. I told him I adopted that saying about a week ago and am currently living that way. I said if he wants to "get his head out of his a$$" (as he put it) or grow the he11 up, then perhaps we can start to build a new relationship. I told him no matter how this turns out it won't be easy.

H said last Friday when I left was a turning point for him. H said he couldn't stand what he did to the W whom he had professed his love to.

I ended the conversation, got up to let the dog in. I hope I'm on the right path here. I've always been the one H could turn to, to talk to, to make things better. I can't do that for him this time.

Okay, you guys should be proud of this. I DID NOT cry. I was about to when I wrote my earlier post but I held it in. I know it's okay to cry but it wasn't the right time because I knew H would be walking back through the door at any moment. (H did comment on how strong I am since returning from this past weekend)