As much as I want to lash out, and tell her how wrong she is being, at least I know that it would be the wrong thing to do. So I guess I will let this stew in me and go to bed pissed and hope I can wake up calm! I have to work in the morning, so I am going to try to get a good night sleep out of it! GGGGGRRRRR!!!!!!! Please tell me I am doing the right thing by not feeding into this!
Why was she trying to call & TM? The kids were with you so you know it wasn't an emergency concerning them. She might as well get used to that idea now....right? You aren't going to be there for her beck & call when she leaves.
You did the right thing by acting "as if". If she's pissed, then it is her problem....not yours. You did nothing wrong. Cell phones are not another limb and can be detached once in a while.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
The only thing I can come up with as to why she is calling and TM is to keep tabs on me. Cake eating. Keeping me in place for what she needs here, and going out to "get what she wants" elsewhere. She knew I was disappointed in her tonight. Leaving me to go out when I was supposed to be helping her, something she had been asking for, I made sure she was aware that I was disappointed in her, but that it was her choice. Her response was we just do it Sunday, and I made sure to let her know that Sunday was going to be out of the question. I have a very full day Sunday. Even if I don't, I will now.
Well I did just about everything I could possibly do wrong in a conversation. Told W she is disrespectful,rude and needs to lose her bad attitude. Let her keep bringing up OM in the conversation. Kids walked in on this fight so I just left. Pissed me off that she decided to take that time to tell them on her own without me there that she is moving out!
Wonder if that will help reality set in or if it will one more "independant" thing she can do?
I wished it would, but it won't. The fact that she told the kids without anymore forethought put into it, tells you how selfish and where her "focus" is, which is the OM and how to be with him. However, once she is really on her own.....she may discover that OM is not so quick to want to get committed to any R. But, there again....don't hold your breath.
Take care of your kids b/c they are hurting bad right now.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
