So now, she's at home having a pity party. Does anybody have any advice on this. W won't tell me what's going on other everybody is telling her how much of a mistake she is making and it would be easier to just move out of the state and start again. I left.
Wow, she complains that she is not capable of getting a job, I offer to help build and write a resume, she accepts. So what happens next, I get home from work and we are supposed to work on the resume, she is on her way out the door to go out! Hmmmm.....guess getting a job is not a top priority for somebody.
Ok, you're answer is "Not mad or bothered....just thought you were ready to get this resume going so you can get a kick ass job....? But no, you go have a good time and be careful. I have plans for the weekend, but I'll see when I can squeeze you in to work on that resume." Done
She is unbelievable! She shows no sign of responsibility or maturity so I doubt she makes it on her own for any length of time.....that is, if she ever makes it out of the house! Has she always depended on you for EVERYTHING or is she simply that spoiled?
I try not to go against any advise that one of the DB Coaches give so that is one reason I didn't respond earlier, but you offered to help her with a resume and you see how she treated you. A sure sign of disrepect--if I ever saw it. So, I personally don't think you should offer to help her with anything else. It's one thing to try to act friend-ly, but quite another to lay down and let her wipe her feet on you.
You deserve much better treatment than this. When you start believing that you deserve better and acting like you deserve better....then she'll start to believe it as well.
Take care, Sandi
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Sandi, I agree completely. She has been spoiled as of late. We have always been a hard working couple, but I believe she has just taken it for granted latlely. I am done offering at this point. I think tonight was one of the most disrespectful and rude things yet. (maybe not, but felt like it tonight). I really was quite surprised she could t have said anything prior to me getting home from work In time for to basically just say goodbye.
In all honesty, I was very self-centered when I was almost a WAW. It is part of the symptoms. You'd think the way I react to some of these posts that I had never been there myself, but as I just told another person....when we are the ones in the stitch, it's often hard to see things as they really are.
I'm so sorry you are going through this. I'm glad you are here with friends.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
So I am with some friends and don't get a couple of phone calls or texts. My phone is not on me! So why am I the bad guy for not answering or responding! Seriously! I am with the kids outside, they could verify! In less than one hour, I dont respond to two texts, and don't answer two phone calls. I answered the third one that was at my house as I walked in the door, just to get jumped about avoiding the W! C'mon, 1 hour! And I am the A$$h0lE! Seriously! I know that I am just venting, and didn't let her get any of this, cuz I just gave the "as-if" attitude, which was real, because I didn't get or need to anyway, the calls! EFFMEEEEE!!!!!!
