Well keep in mind that he has to believe the changes are permanent. For me and H.....it's a chicken/egg question....did I start to annoy him with my endless b***hing, or did he start to spend more time out of the house first, hence the endless b***hing? Either way, he started to spend more time out, I started to complain and nag more, then he'd be out even more, then more nagging....and it just got more and more vicious. Amazing to look back with all of the knowledge I have now....I should have just shut up and changed things with actions and not endless complaining and being critical....hmmmm. But, once your H sees you are serious about the new you, that you like you and you plan to keep this you around, he'll be happy about those changes too, THEN hopefully work on himself. At the right time, you have to remind him, he makes him happy, not you. You can help, but ultimately, he's got the make the happy in him first.
Just be the person you like and the wife all of his friends will tell him he's crazy to ever leave.
You CAN do this. Sounds like he doesn't want to leave, he just wants some changes. And I'm cool with my H wanting positive changes from me too. If he wanted me to do stupid things we'd both be screwed, but what my H wants is reasonable, any person would want a happy marriage with someone positive and happy. So I'm good with it. I benefit too.
