So it begins to get over my wife

[MrBond]

It's understandable. Especially when you started playing around with her (figuratively speaking) she no longer became your W, but a pawn. So there was no emotion.

Going back to your original posts, you mentioned all the things your W had done. Was there anything that she told you that she had problems with as her reason for leaving? You're going to have to think hard and pick up any little things she might have mentioned. Were they valid points? If you don't believe so and don't think you need to change anything, then you're going to have to give her up now because it's going to happen again.

That's what happens when you detach too much and why DR puts so much emphasis on working on yourself first. It then becomes a matter of whether or not you really want them back. Everyone makes mistakes it just depends on whether or not you're willing to forgive her for hers. That's why before I think I mentioned that it's going to be twice as hard to work on the M when she's back.

Even by just saying "I'll give it a shot", it's a way to rebuild.

You are going to have to realize that you may never get her to explain why she did the things she did. If you can let that go and start off with a clean slate, then I think you've got a chance at making it work.