There was a book mentioned in a recent post and now I can't find it... something about Tough Love?? I know you have a lot of input on books.. thank you
whenever I come through here I've been reading a lot of the more seasoned DB'ers talking about respect in relation to love. I saw a reply in another post where you talked about your H becoming less passive and how much your respect grew for him once that change was made. I believe I could be a lot like him in a lot of aspects (as in the way he was). I do know your H told you that if you D him he was done. I do believe that is a boundary stance I might have to take with my W if it ever comes down to that. I've also been thinking about other 'hard' conversations I may have to make soon regarding other issues. For instance I believe my parents are entering the latter stage of their life and I really want to have a long, hard conversation about getting our ducks in a row. You may or may not know that I haven't really initiated any convo with my W for a while and while I hope it doesn't reinforce any ideas I may be avoidant I am actually doing it for my own personal detachment regarding our sitch. Anyway, I would love to hear about the changes your H made btw. I would love a basis of comparison. Talk about it here if you wish or maybe swing by my thread. Talk to you later!
sandi, I am pasting/posting this here as well as on orich's divorce not busted thread to ensure you read it soon.
Originally Posted By: Gardener
Originally Posted By: sandi2
Gardener. I chose those words of "LBH's just don't get it" on purpose. Do you know why? B/c I knew that somebody would react to it. You see, I have been here for two years reading all the "cruel" choice of words about WAW's and nobody is complaining about that!! I have read some very cruel words! It hurts, doesn't it? Yes, I will agree about a lot of things where WAW's are concerned, but it still hurts when that is nearly all I read from resentful, angry men who join each other in their LBH club and show each other pity. And those five little words really jumped out, didn't it? Hummmmmm
Sandi, I figured you were being deliberate, there. I wasn't positive, but pretty sure and I was just attempting to keep things "light". I am in agreement with you on the cruel words and sometimes dismissive labels. I've mentioned as much on my own thread a while back, saying that I will no longer refer to my wife as a WAW or other abbreviation even as keystroke-saving shorthand. No problem with anyone else using LBH, WAW, etc., I just began feeling personally uncomfortable using it. I'm with you on this.
Gardener
"My soul, be satisfied with flowers, With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them In the one garden you may call your own." Cyrano deBergerac
