It is true, usually letting the anger go without thinking first tends to get us quite a few steps back instead of forward. I am lucky, because I tend to always think before charging, but I had my moments too The black bag thing reminds me of when during the first affair my H had his suitcase in the car for almost a month. We had had our first big blown up when by accident I found him and the ow coming out of an hotel room - and I mean by accident, swear! - and he just rushed home ahead of me packed the suitcase and left. He actually came back the same day and never really left, but the dar suitcase was in the car for so long!!!! After a while I could see that he was as tired of having it there as I was of seing it there, but didn't want to show it - better break than bend , that's his motto and it was more so at that time. So when his uncle asked him to help him move some furniture to the cottage he was ready in 5 minutes and the suitacse home in 3 While he was helping his uncle I started unpacking his things ... what the &^#^^^$ ??? I don't know what he intended to do with what was inside but it was unusable: one pair of socks ( that didn't even fit him because they belonged to our son! ), his winter jacked ( we're talking August here! ) , a bunch of dress shirts, ( he never even wears them! ), and silly stuff like that. I'm not sure waht he was thinking when he packed but no wonder he hadn't left.. how could he with only that junk? LOL ANyway, a big hug to you and hang in there, things can only get better from here. nightshade
"Each and every one of us is deserving of a kind word, a gentle thought and the gift of understanding. "
