Haven't been on these boards in a long time. I had sometime to kill tonight and thought I would check in on some old friends. I'm sorry your w is now your xW and she couldn't see the painful path that she has chosen. I won't go into my whole sitch but one thing that I can tell you after being D for 18 months is to only worry about the things that you can control. If she wants to complain to you about how you handle your boys.... ignore it. If she wants to interogate your boys after you have them let her. Don't let her selfishness change the way you live your life and take care of your boys. She cheated, she left, she is nolonger your problem. Yes, she will have an influence on your boys, but, that brings me back to my orginal point... Worry about what you can control. Your boys will see the way your living your life and will follow your example. If your xW is as crazy as she sounds they will see the difference and will again be drawn to your example. Hopefully overtime the non-sense will stop (never really does though...)and she too can once again be a positive influence to your boys.
Again, I haven't been on the boards in a long while, so if I miss reading your last couple of post forgive me.
